A Touch of Frost

I love growing old with my wife and seeing our bodies change – gracefully for her, but not for me.  Well, my body is primarily changing for the worse and it’s getting more difficult to get rid of the excessive baby fat.  Despite the extra tire taking shape, I’m still a good looking bloke … according to the missus … she loves me.  It’s a bit like Mr. Incredible when he’s no longer a hero, except I’m not strong and I don’t have a super hero suit. My kids still think I’m the Incredible Hulk.  Obviously, I don’t turn green and remember my daughter did compare me with Shrek!  Oh dear, what am I becoming?

I’ve noticed that I’m no longer as fit as I was. So, playing football in the park with the kids is something I try to avoid.  I don’t want to embarrass my kids in front of their friends as I stand there heaving for air, while leaning against the bench or the goal post.

On the other hand, it doesn’t really bother me to have a few extra pounds scattered around the body.  I love to live and why should I not enjoy life’s simple pleasures such as food?  It’s not like I over-indulge or binge eat. I don’t really understand why one can’t enjoy butter, olive oil, etc..  Food is delicious!

I haven’t developed wrinkles, sporadic baldness or grey hair yet because of my natural beauty and genes.  Damn it, I’m not even 40 yet!  But, I’ve noticed that a lot of my friends and colleagues have been cursed by Voldemort and they are starting to show grey streaks – or a Touch of Frost as I like to say.

One of the frosty victims is also my beautiful wife.  She hates it when I tease her, even if I say that Gandalf, Storm and Helen Mirren look beautiful with grey/white hair. The reaction I get is normally a few quick ninja punches on the shoulder.  She only has a few streaks, so I don’t see what the fuzz is all about.  At least she doesn’t have a mustache with grey hairs like some old women have.  I love her anyway and a the mustache just tickles when we kiss. Just joking!

I don’t fully understand why people are so worried about getting old.  What’s the obsession with botox and plastic surgery?  Be proud of yourself.  I’m looking forward to joining the Grey Army. I’ve heard they are drafting recruits all the time.

Growing old together is fun.  You see each other change.  I have to admit, seeing my wife age with grace, is actually a turn on … but don’t tell her 🙂

My only worry about getting old is loosing control of vital bodily functions.  There’s nothing worse than sharing a lift with a member of the Grey Army, while they loudly break wind or burp – as if nothing unusual happened.  And, I’m not a big fan of adult diapers either.  The only comforting factor is that they might exaggerate Los Shrimpo area, but I wouldn’t need to wear one anyway.

The ever lasting thought is how much energy and money, if any, should I waste on enhancing my corpus?  Well, deep inside I really want to be more active, but it’s very difficult to get the will out from the abyss of my temple.

I swear, before I’m 40 I’ll be fully fit again.

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