Abducted? Nah!!

I normally don’t share or comment on articles I read or stumble across, but I simply had to share this little story.

Meet Jeffrey, a not-so-normal guy who was apparently abducted by ET … or something similar.

You have to question the intentions of these possible abductors, as they could surely find a more attractive specimen, considering they are planning to learn more about the human race.  What message does this send to the alien abductors?

… these humans are push-overs.  Give them some alcohol, an inflatable doll and then we’ll rule over their measly little planet.  They are scum!

Surely, we as humans want to get a little more respect from our fellow space travelers.

Anyway, read Jeffrey’s story carefully, and see if you can see what really happened.

“It happened eleven years ago in St. Louis, Missouri at an exotic dancing bar. I went in there to just have a few drinks and look at some strip-girls dance around the pole. And this guy comes in out of nowhere and he was black in color but he had a very strange voice. And he knew things about me that no-one in the bar knew. Like how many trips I took. He knew things I was doing. He knew when my parents were going to die and what they were going to die of. Then he tells me he’s here to abduct me and replace forty nine chips [in my body]. Dr. Lewinsky one of those Grey hybrids was going to do the operation. And they were going to take me aboard a flying saucer. […] I was swept up for like three hours and they did exactly what they said they were going to do to me and then took me back to the bar and woke me up and I lost three hours in time.”

I’m sure you found the story illuminating and fascinating, just as I did, but here’s my take on this little “abduction”.

Jeffrey visited the local strip joint, probably after payday, got absolutely hammered, was sexually assaulted by Gremlins and woke up three hours later with a serious hangover.

Worse, he might have attempted to grope the pole dancing she-man and was punched unconscious by the over-sized Eastern European bouncer, but decided to say he had been abducted instead.

Honestly, if you were an alien, would you have abducted Jeffery?

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